Once upon a time there was a dog. One day, this dog turned into a duck, though he was still very much a dog as well, and he spent the rest of his life as a douckg, quarking at people who passed by. Physicists were amazed at this douckg's ability to turn subatomic particles into a verb that involved using one's vocal cords to make a sound that resembled a cross between a bark and a quack, and they praised the douckg's ingenuity and brilliance. Unfortunately, the douckg had not realized that these were the stupid physicists of the town, and he was horribly disappointed when his newfound fame was taken away from him upon the realization that his quarking was simply a mix of a bark and a quack. The douckg returned to his pond-side doghouse and slept for days, feeling very depressed.
After a week or so, however, the douckg realized that there was something else he could offer to the world. And so, he set out one bright September morning and got himself a job at Disneyland. He was very happy after that, because Disneyland is awesome.
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