Thursday, April 14, 2011

Daily Story 5 - Cat Poop

(This one is dedicated to my brother.)

Once upon a time there was a cat.  He was a grey cat.  His name was Gandhi.  He liked to meow at people, and he liked to play.  He was a big cat, and all his long fur made him look incredibly fat.  He enjoyed life because he didn't have to worry about food or water.  He had a warm home and his human didn't pester him with stupid prissy outfits or annoying cutesy voices.  Yes, life was good in his little home in Munich.

However, there was something missing in his life.  There was a treasure he'd been seeking, ever since he was a tiny little kitten with tiny little pawsies.  No.  Paws.  He was not going to sink to the level of those pesky guests his human allowed into his home from time to time.  He was a dignified cat, the pride of the apartment, even if he wasn't allowed out of his human's small room half the time...

Nevertheless, Gandhi was master of the house.  There was no denying it.  After all, if the humans tried to poison him with disgusting food, he could easily get revenge by having an 'accident' on the living room floor.  Sure, he could avoid the mess by lurking near his commode, but what was the point in making things easy for the humans?  No, he was certainly the one in charge.

Unfortunately, this was not enough to ease the uncertainty that gnawed at his mind day after day.  He knew not where he could find that treasure he sought, only that it was somewhere out of reach.  And so one morning, while his human was away, Gandhi left his warm and comfortable home to find what he was looking for.

He searched in the alleys, and he searched in the streets.  He searched the U-Bahn, and he searched the S-Bahn.  He searched through stores, and he searched through parks.  He searched everywhere a cat could go, and he found nothing.  Eventually he gave up and returned home.  His human had not returned, so Gandhi decided to leave a message for him on the middle of the dining room floor before returning to the comfort of his bed.

His human was very baffled as to how Gandhi had managed to get out of his room and poop on the dining room floor when the door was shut just as tightly as it had been when he'd left.

(note: this was written when Gandhi was still alive. He passed away this January. :( )

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